One Year

One year ago today Jared invited himself over to my apartment for a movie night 

and my life hasn't been the same since.

Today I've been thinking back to last year and what was going through my head, and it just makes me smile.

Jared was and is everything I needed in my life.

I'm so glad Heavenly Father places people in our lives right when we need them.

He knows exactly what we need.

One year ago I was content. I was happy with who I was and what I was doing, I loved myself. I was actually thinking of moving out of Logan at the end of the summer. It was the next step, move out of college life and onto my career life, time to grow up a little more.

That night Jared came over and Tami and I were flirting with the guy downstairs trying to get him and his roommates to come up. They never did. I took the Love Sac and slept through the movie. After the movie I woke up for a min but dozed back off. Jared was still there talking to Tami about how to make her move on our neighbor that she liked and he decided to use me as his prop. 

He grabbed my knee scaring me awake and then held my hand. All the while going through my head was.. "What is going on. You can let go of my hand now. Umm boys don't like me what are you doing? This is kinda weird." At that point in my life I'd never had a boyfriend. I was friends with guys and I had crushes on them. But guys that liked me took me out on a few dates and then stopped talking to me, almost as if they'd falling off the edge of the Earth.

After Jared went home we stayed up chatting on Facebook for another hour or so. Not knowing it I'd met my Husband. Looking back now he was exactly what I'd always dreamed of... A guy who had guts. I was crushing on another guy at that time, but Jared was forward and took the initiative to 'weasel'  his way into my life and more importantly into my heart.

Now that we are apart I love him even more. 

The distance helps me see the little things about him that I miss.

I miss his hugs.

I miss him surprising me by coming home for the night when I thought he'd be in Salt Lake still.

I miss date night.

I miss cuddling on our couch watching TV.

I miss his smile.

I miss his laugh. But that I hear occasionally when I send him goofy stuff.

I can't wait for many more years together with him. 

Jared you are my hero! Stay safe. I love you lots and lots.

sometimes you just have hard days

I feel like I just ramble on sometimes.

I wonder why you guys read this.

But its a good outlet for me, I can write when I need to.

Today was hard. It started out wet and rainy so I didn't go on a run like I planned. (yes a run! I've decided to start running as Jared likes to and would like to run together.)

Jared and I tried to Skype but his connection wasn't strong enough so we just messaged.

Then the Xbox login got all messed up and I couldn't get Netflix up and I couldn't fix it.

I sent Jared a package today. I think that was most of the problem. Sometimes I just miss him so much, and wish he was here around the house. Even for stupid things like the messed up Xbox.

I love him so much and am so PROUD of MY HERO. As hard this is I wouldn't change it. For whatever reason we need to go through this, and I know it will make us stronger. It will strengthen our marriage.

I fell in love with Jared while he was gone last summer and this is just making that love stronger. I realize the things that I love most about him. What I miss about him. Like him playing Xbox while I do the laundry. Or us making dinner together. Summer picnics. Shooting up the canyon. Date night.

Thinking about all of these makes me happy looking forward to his Homecoming.

3 long weeks

Tomorrow!!! Tomorrow is the day I get to fly out to see the love of my life!!!

Isn't he so handsome!! And he's all mine for a few days.

My flight isn't till 8 pm  so I don't get to Texas till midnight, and now there has been some change with their pass days so I may have to get the car and check into the hotel by myself and not see him till Thursday afternoon. But the bonus is that he doesn't have to be back till Monday morning where he was originally suppose to be back Sunday at midnight.

Even though it has been hard having him gone, I think it makes our love for each other so much stronger. I realize the little things that I miss him for, like cleaning the house together, grocery shopping together, hanging out with family together. Relaxing at night together. I think that is the hardest one. When I've worked all day and get off at 7 I don't really want to go anywhere, but it gets lonely sitting on my couch, eating dinner, and watching something on Netflix by myself.

I truly fell in love with Jared when he was gone this summer. He had to go to California for 3 weeks in July for his AT (annual training) and in that time we fell in love and started talking about maybe getting married. Sometimes distance hurts the relationship, but in ours it brings us closer together. It helps us appreciate the other person, and helps us remember why we love each other.